I imagine there's a good psychological thriller on hoarding
for someone who wants to write it. Or at least a really fucked up young adult novel about going to grandma's house and being swallowed up by the mess she thinks keeps her safe from whatever her personal boogie man is. The climactic scene could have our lead character trying to reach a garbage bag. Or the front door. Or even a Broom +2 for all my gamer friends - you know who you are. And the junk, maybe even the walls would be reaching out to take them. That's when the speech would have to happen.At least now is when it has to happen here, because that's what it feels like is happening. I'm headed back later in the week, and while victory seems impossible, a stalemate would be nice. Otherwise it feels like just going back to wait for some awful accident.
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No inspirational words to offer, unfortunately, but faith in you to channel the force.
June 13, 2010 at 7:31 PMJust wanted to let you know I edited a book review of a y.a. novel about hoarding, just last month. Let me see ... it's CJ Omololu's Dirty Little Secrets. The protagonist's mother is the hoarder, but I don't want to give away too much.
I imagine that script in the vein of Stephen King's early stories (one was called "The Mangler," I think, about a laundry machine) -- all about inanimate objects that take on lives of their own.
June 13, 2010 at 8:02 PMBut yes, you can do it! Maybe BYOB (bring your own Broom)?
See, to me this trip--observed from the outside, anyway--is starting to resemble something like a classic horror film. And I am not sure what you, our hero, should be saying right now. (If we're staying true to the genre, I suppose you should be making out with some tasty young thing just before the moment of crisis...) But I do know what I, as horrified audience member, am saying at this point in the narrative: "Aiyee! Get out! Get out! For the love of sweet Jeebus, why does he not GET OUT of there?!?!"
June 13, 2010 at 10:20 PMHere's hoping you're the proverbial Final Girl who is left to tell the tale when it's all over.
The inspirational speech is this: you don't need to finish cleaning, you just need to clean as much as you reasonably can before leaving. If that means taking a day off from cleaning while still there, that's fine too. The point is, you may not get to finish cleaning this time but it is all right, you will still have accomplished a lot.
June 13, 2010 at 11:03 PMP.S. I am so glad I don't hoard. When my grandmother died, she just had a one bedroom apartment with desirable things in it. My mother took the clothes and shoes (all her size, in good shape and styish). I took the jewelry, and I am wearing some of it right now. My parents and I divided the furniture / art / kitchen things (I was transitioning from dorm to apartment, so this was very useful). Period. Emulate this grandmother, everyone!
June 13, 2010 at 11:09 PMPost a Comment